/ 25.1.11 / 21 Comments / family , Tuesday Tea
When Our Children Are Hurting…
Today is Tuesday Tea and I’d love to have you join me for a hot cup of your favorite tea and a little heart to heart chat. If you’d like to join us, you can just leave comments or write your own post and link up with any photos of tea cups or anything else pretty on your blog, but please, do remember to link back here. I’ll be sure to visit you and hope our readers will too. The challenges of mothering were on my heart today so that is what I’d like to talk about, but feel free to share on any subject. :o)
Being a mother is, in my opinion, one of the most rewarding experiences in life. But as some of my blogging friends can tell you, it can be one of the most painful experiences too. One of my friends lost both her adult son and wife…and I know she is still hurting. If we never had children and never loved them..we could escape the pain of losing them or of seeing them suffer in one way or another. Yes, it would be much easier. But this is certainly a case of better to have loved and lost, than not loved at all.
Most of my days as a mother of teenagers and adult children are very happy ones—full, rich, rewarding, and most of all…BUSY! We laugh a lot, disagree at times, and do a lot teasing in our big family. But life isn’t always that way. Sometimes things go wrong. And when they do, our children hurt…and we hurt with them.
This past week has been one of those ‘hurting times’… The grief and pain that my daughter is experiencing is one I would give anything to have been able to help her avoid. I simply couldn’t. What unnerves me most, is that in many ways, I honestly didn’t see it coming and I feel that I should have. I had concerns but she had allayed them for the most part. I had to trust her judgment when she said everything was fine…but complicated. I really can’t say any more, other than to say that things are no longer fine…
She will survive the painful ordeal and some day the sun will shine again for her. But Saturday morning found Tim and I snuggled with Rebekah on the couch trying our best to be a comfort to her. We didn’t talk…we just held her. That’s usually the best way to comfort anyone who’s hurting. Words often fail at times like these.
This week also saw her getting her first ticket and being involved in a small wreck…all the day after she found out the other bad news. She made a simple and split second error. No one was hurt, but she felt terrible of course! (Especially, since it was my little car and we don't have full coverage.) I guess there is no question that the Lord is working in her life right now…refining and purifying her heart. She said as much to me herself. She is a strong young woman and she recognizes that though it may not sometimes feel like it…her Heavenly Father is in control…and he cares. Just as we, her earthly parents, weep with her…so her heavenly parent does too…as he does for all of us in our times of sorrow.
As if that was not enough grief for one week, my oldest son was deployed Tuesday…and on the same day my next to youngest son met with us and a recruiter with the Texas Army National Guard in our living room, since he will be signing up this week. He will be going to college full time right after boot camp…but still…I wasn’t quite ready for yet another chick to leave the nest..so soon!
And still another grown son, who lost his job at Christmas, told me that he and his wife and the grandchildren may be moving to Oregon because of a great job offer he received. They also lost their hot water heater this week (the secondary one thank goodness) and the two grandbabies were diagnosed with pneumonia. Is it any wonder that I was feeling almost sick with worry? One night I could hardly sleep…so I just laid there trying to pray.
I finally had to have a little talk with the Lord and I felt that he reminded me that I will have to choose to walk in faith if I want to be a blessing and a help to my children as they, too, go through the lessons and challenges of life… It makes me think of a song I wrote in college…
What is Faith?
When things are really going good, it’s easy to be strong.
But when the waves start getting rough, Oh who is really wrong?
Lord teach me how to trust in you, no matter what I see.
Help me keep my eyes on you, Lord, help me to believe…
I need faith…the gift of Faith..
Faith is standing on the Father’s Word
A mother on her knees,
the trust of a child,
or a bird on the breeze.
It’s the hope of the weary,
the strength of the young..
Faith is trusting in Christ Jesus..God’s only Son,
Today, I'm feeling so much better! Everything is moving in a better direction. The Lord answered several prayers this week…A son seems to have a new job, the kids brought the grandbabies over on Sunday night for dinner and they seemed to be recovering rapidly on their antibiotics, my daughter-in-law, Amanda, Matthew's wife, got a roommate, an older woman who wants to help her learn how to parent better and be a better homemaker while Matthew is overseas, and Rebekah was feeling less sad and a little more cheerful today. We’re sewing aprons this evening. That's always a good sign. The sale of my daughter's horse, didn’t go through after all, (Tex has been gone two months) so he will be home again soon. She realized that the Lord knew she would need a distraction…and caring for Tex will help so much. She’s focusing on the bright side as best she can in spite of how really awful she feels, knowing that there is a purpose for every trial.
I don’t know what struggles or trials you or your children may be facing, but I do know that you don’t have to go through them alone. If you are hurting, just know that you have many friends… Drop me an email if you need to chat. As mothers, we must have faith…in our children…and in our Heavenly Father who knows what they need…and what we need…before we even ask. What is on your heart today? I know we’d all like to comfort those of you who are carrying heavy burdens this week and rejoice with those of you who are rejoicing…
Here are some scriptures that are helpful at times like these...
Here are some scriptures that are helpful at times like these...
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
Matthew 6:7“And when you are praying, do not use meaningless repetition as the Gentiles do, for they suppose that they will be heard for their many words. 8“So do not be like them; for your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.
My favorite visitor at Tuesday Tea last week was Rayanne's post about having Whittard "Russian Caravan" tea ...along with a good book of Old English poems and a recipe for Chocolate Coconut muffins... I also enjoyed Faith, Hope and CherryTea's post about Hope That Inspires and Fishtail Cottage's darling story about sharing tea with her little girls. She even showed the matching tea set they used!
I had my favorite standby this morning... Lipton black tea…It was good and strong…just what I needed! How about you? What tea are you drinking this week? Got any good recipes for goodies to go with our tea? Rebekah and I would love to test your recipe out if you send it to us. :o)
PS. I'm linking up to a life changing blogs...