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It's been so long since we had our weekly 'tea'. Would you like to join me for a cup? I got to musing the other day and thought I'd share my thoughts with you.
Have you ever thought about what you would do, if there was nothing on your ' to do list'? What if there were no bills to pay, no groceries to buy,...
No, there’s nothing wrong with my marriage..or our budget for that matter. :o) I’ve just been working on the budget this week and will be chatting over our financial plans for the month at a date night with Dear Hubby this evening, so naturally the topic is on my mind.
A sample debt snowball.
I was also working on our ‘debt snowball’ yesterday using a debt snowball calculator from What’s the Cost.com. The chart above was just an example. It’s a great tool recommended by my financial hero, Dave Ramsey.
Putting a little extra ‘sparkle’ in our marriage has also been on my mind. (I think my mind needs to go on a vacation—tee-hee!) I found a great used book on this topic, 52 ways to Re-energize Your Marriage, while killing time at a coffee shop/book store. Voila! A new post is born. :o)
I found it interesting this morning, to discover that conflicts over money were listed as #2 on James Dobson’s list of 12 marriage killers….. Curious what #1 is?? Read on….
Welcome to Tuesday Tea! I’d love to have a chat with you over a nice cup of tea..perhaps poured over ice. Both Amy of Tea Girl in a Coffee World with her post Heat Wave Tea and Wanda Lee of the Silken Purse, whose friend hosted an International student ‘tea’ with iced tea in tea cups decided to skip the ‘hot’ part. So I’m in good company. :o)
I so enjoyed everyone’s tea posts last week. Thank you so much for linking up. The comments you left were so insightful! That’s what makes our chat so fun—your input on the ‘topic’ whatever that might be. Please feel free to link up here.
So….how can a budget improve your marriage? I think it’s pretty obvious, but I mustn’t assume. I’ve had friends who never even thought to have a budget. Not to worry, you can find some great ones righthere.
Yesterday we talked about the movie, “The Pursuit of Happyness.” It showed, in stark colors, how financial pressures can destroy a marriage.
The main message of the movie, which was based on a true story, was to show the courage of a man who was determined to provide for his family against all odds. Sadly, his wife grew tired of waiting for the solution. And who could blame her? She worked double shifts while hubby tried to sell outdated computer equipment. She brought in money and he was unable to at the time. Bill collectors can sure kill romance!
Some of the things that can cause financial stress in a marriage are
One of you is a ‘spender’ and one is a ‘saver’….or some milder version of this... and you have trouble seeing ‘eye to eye’ on money matters.
Excessive debt which puts a heavy burden on Hubby or Wife.
Overspending without regard to the lack of finances.
Being discontent with what you have.
Financial Reverses
Using spending as a way to ‘get back’. (Getting to the bottom of the barrel here.)
One of you is very focused on saving for the future…while the other is out bargain hunting for immediate needs.
And there are many more…
Looks like Christian needs to retire these shoes! LoL!
One thing is for sure, a budget is a GREAT solution…as long as you are both using money for it’s proper purpose—meeting material needs...and you are on the same ‘side’. :o)
If your marriage is to the point where money has become a weapon or is a constant source of fighting…it’s probably a good time to seek some counseling. Most marriage problems come down to a lack of mutual love and respect rather than the problem itself. This is where you need to start.
A couple who cares about each other faces their problems together..whether it’s money, depression, rebellious children, job loss, in-laws or health problems.
First..build your relationship and work to grow closer. THEN tackle your problems..rather than each other! You are in this for the long run not the short-term. You need each other. Together all of your problems will seem lighter.
It’s important not to blame each other, but rather discuss the issues and try to hear each other’s perspective on money. Rarely is it a one-sided problem. If one spouse is having severe problems, however, and they are open to discussing it, you can help them work through it rather than condemn them.
One of the best ways to say, “I love you” to your spouse is to spend money in a way that is mutually acceptable. A budget helps you ‘pin down’ what needs to be spent and when, taking into account both points of view.
Since I have a hard time with ‘impulse spending’, Hubby and I have put some ‘checks and balances’ in place to help me stay in the budget. These were my ideas mind you. :o)
Tim and I both get a daily email alert telling us what our checking account balance is and what transactions have taken place. This puts some accountability in place (and I need that!) and also makes sure that we both know how things are going financially regardless of how crazy our schedule has gotten.
We’ve also put some ‘spending money’ in the budget so I know what the ‘limit’ is on spending for projects or home improvements. As far as Hubby was concerned…you just quit spending on anything. (Sounds a lot like the idea of dieting by just not eating any more—LoL!)
For Tim, this was a great solution. He has a ‘far reaching’ perspective. He doesn’t EVER want anything that money can buy. He just wants to save for the future. His focus is on our ‘future’ security and happiness.
For me, as a mom surrounded by active teens, the immediate needs of our family are the focus. I’m thinking about today, tomorrow and perhaps next week and what needs to get done. I’m focused on details and what needs to be done NOW.
We had to find a middle ground. We often joke that Tim is part ‘monk’ and I’m not. The kids, being kids, didn’t care for that approach much either. To ignore immediate needs for future security is no more realistic than spending all your money with no regard for future security.
With a mutually agreed upon budget, we make allowances for both perspectives. We’ve set aside money for immediate needs and even wants, and put a lot of money on our past debt (much of it medical), plus we put a decent amount of money into our emergency fund every month. We even have a small retirement fund. Now we are ALL happier.
If you would like more help on this topic..be sure to check out Dave Ramsey’s website. I think taking the Financial Peace workshop is one of the best things you can do for your marriage..and what a perfect wedding present for a young couple!
Why do I talk so much about marriage? Because, if you really think about it, is there anything more integral to your lifelong happiness than a good relationship with your spouse? It’s worth working at.. We need to nuture our marriage...just like you would a flower. If we don’t take care of our marriage relationship..it could wither!
I’m working on ‘me’ and on ‘us’. It’s an investment worth making. Learning to spend within our agreed upon budget, getting out of debt, saying NO to unnecessary expenses--these are great ways to say “I LOVE YOU” to our Dear Hubbies.
I’m so grateful to good friends like Christi L. and her hubby who hosted a Financial Peace class in their home. Our older kids attended with us…and I learned how to discuss financial matters with hubby in a constructive way and to say NO to ME (and the kids) through this class.
Perhaps, like me, you would like to make a quiet promise to the Lord, to “honor your husband’ in your spending..each time you walk into the doors of a store (or online). :o)
Hi Friends, I hope you are having a lovely day. As I sip my tea, it is raining! (Thank you, Lord!) It's only one of many blessings we've enjoyed this week. Birthdays, Anniversary, guests, and a son soon to be home from the military...frankly it's hard to keep count! :o)
One of the highlights of last week, was having more than one 'lady' for tea several times. There's nothing quite like company for a truly special tea. :o)
In honor of our visitors, I even made scones. (Yipes!--I did eat one very small one.) they were so so good! Rebekah and I especially enjoy this recipe. We also had blackberry tea and wedding tea (almond/white jasmine) and plenty of fresh mango and cantaloupe. Leisurely breakfasts really are the best part of having guests for the weekend. :o)
How about you? What are you having for tea this morning? I do hope you will join us. Feel free to link up right here if you want to share your posts of pretty tea things and delicious treats, or even thoughts on our topic today.
Since yesterday was our 24th anniversary (Wow-time sure does fly when you're having fun!), I thought I'd share photos of our little celebration. Considering that it was squeezed in between so many other events, we didn't do a big to-do though we did go out to Olive Garden which was just perfect. In addition, my secret sister gave us such a DARLING package to help make the day fun.
And we thoroughly enjoyed our 'celebration in a box'....lovely glasses, champagne, and the movie, Julie and Julia. What a great idea for an anniversary gift! (PS. This is a great movie for bloggers' hubbies to watch with them..Tim laughed a LOT..and it's very romantic too.)
Chatting with a son about relationships and thinking of how much Dear Hubby and I love each other so much in spite of many ups and downs, got me to thinking of the topic of Love. So that's what I'd like to chat with you about today, over tea. :o)
Jacob 19, Christian 16, Tim and Donna, Rebekah 20
(Matthew 25 and Andrew 22 not pictured here)
It's so easy after years of marriage and many of life's events, to get a little careless about showing love to those we rely on the most, our spouses. Not only that, but today's definition of 'true love' has gotten terribly clouded if you ask me. As Marianne from Sense and Sensibility asked, "Is love a fancy...or a feeling..or a Farrows?" That sums up today's take on love, I'm afraid.
What I love best is love as depicted in the recent movie, Fireproof. I'm sure many of you have either seen the movie, or read the book. The book is the best part! Love certainly does include feelings...but for it to last, it has to go a lot further.
Love that lasts and is genuine...is based on a choice to treat someone in a very specific way and to value that person above all others. Love is something we experience based on the actions of others towards us or of our actions towards them. Act loving towards someone, and you will soon feel love for that someone. It's just the way we humans are wired.
However, it's a little bit more complicated than that. Love has a lot to do with our motives too. I Corinthians 13 contrasts a love that comes from a sense of duty and shows itself only in 'public acts'...'doing things' for others, versus truly loving that person from the heart.
Love is patient, kind, gentle, polite, hopeful, and faithful. When we have this heart for others, we are loving them and then all those things we do, really do spell "L-O-V-E" to those around us. No gal I know wants flowers and dates...from a sense of 'duty' any more than our men want us to love them strictly from a sense of 'duty'. That kind of love kills.
Love from a sense of duty says, "I choose to 'love' you..but I don't like you." It makes the giver feel better about themselves while allowing them to feel free of all obligation to truly love the recipient from the heart. This is often the result of bitterness over unmet expectations. The pharisees of the bible were very good at this sort of thing and the Lord didn't like it--at all. We sure don't want to do this to our spouses or our children.
So if love is not a duty or a fancy and not primarily a 'feeling'...what does love look like? Our poor guys are constantly scratching their heads trying to figure this one out..while too often we women pine for 'Mr. Knightly" to show up via our dear Mr. Steady hubbies.
If you are waiting for Hollywood to inspire your hubby, you are probably in for a pretty long wait!
When we were newly married, my young husband often wondered how I spelled love .....and I had a hard time explaining what it was I was longing for...
I have to say, that the Love Dare book really hit it on the head...though really, the bible does explain it pretty simply. Thank you, Kendricks, for spelling "L-O-V-E" out so beautifully and practically in your book!
Here are 11 (out of 42) challenges they issue us for showing love in a practical sense...
Day 1: Love is Patient Eph.4:2 ~ Resolve to say nothing negative to your spouse at all. It the temptation arises, choose to say nothing at all.
Day 2: Love is Kind Eph.4:32 Do at least one unexpected gesture as an act of kindness. (Greet first, smile first, serve first.)
Day 3: Love is Not SelfishRomans 12:10 Buy your spouse something that says, "I Love You" today.
Day 4: Love is ThoughtfulPsalm 139:17-18 Call your spouse to ask them how they are...and if there is anything you can do for them today.
Day 5: Love is not RudeProverbs 27:14 Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated at you. Do so without attacking them or justifying yourself. This is from their perspective only.
Day 6: Love is not irritableProverbs 16:32 Choose today to react to tough circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation. Begin by making a list below of areas where you need to add margin to your schedule. Then list any wrong motivations that you need to release from your life.
Day 7: Love believes the best1 Cor. 13:7 Get two sheets of paper. On the first, write out positive things about your spouse. Then write negative things on the second sheet. Set them aside for a later project. Today, pick ONE thing from your positive list and thank your spouse for having this characteristic.
Other challenges....
Determine to become your spouse's biggest fan. Set your heart to focus on their achievements. Take the negative list and discreetly burn it. Share with your spouse about a success he or she recently enjoyed.
Think of a specific way you'd like to greet your spouse. Do it with a smile and enthusiasm. Determine to change your greeting from now on.
Do something out of the ordinary today, something that proves that your love is based on your choice and nothing else...wash her car, clean the kitchen, buy his favorite dessert. Demonstrate love to them for the sheer joy of being their partner in marriage.
What need does your spouse have that you could meet today? Run an errand, foot massage, housework...Say "I cherish you" in a practical way and do it with a smile.
There are 42 challenges in the book. I can't imagine a marriage NOT being WOW after 42 days of challenges like this! The devotions that go along with each one help you to see how to love from God's perspective and are VERY helpful.
How would you like to add more WOW factor to your marriage? No, I'm not getting any 'money' for recommending this book (at least so far I never have earned any 'Amazon earnings' Lol!)...I'm just wanting to inspire you to show love to your spouse in a more practical way and this book helps, if you want it. (half.com is cheaper). This month, I plan to read this book with hubby every day as a gift we can give each other. I know he wants to do this, and this takes that pressure off of him to 'figure love out'. :o)
If you are struggling in your marriage, like the guy in the movie, "Fireproof", this could change everything!
Rarely is trouble in a marriage 'one sided'. When we give to our spouses, the overflow often comes back in our direction.
Too often, both of the spouses decide to quit giving...and the result is the death of a marriage. Someone has to start the ball rolling again. Could it be you?
My prayer is that we ALL celebrate our 50th..and more in the next few years.
Happy Anniversary...to all of us!
(but especially to my Dear Hubby. :o)
Linking with these lovely ladies' Tea Parties..and Sites..
Good Morning friends...and Welcome to our 33rd Tuesday Tea Chat. It's so nice to be back again! I've had a very productive break from blogging but am still working on the taxes. At least I've gotten started which is the hardest part, don't you think? One set is finished and the other is in progress. I got a little sidetracked by my efforts to get healthy and lose weight by juicing which made it hard to focus on the work I had planned.
But this last week was the perfect time to get 'decaffeinated' and get used to juice fasting. (Picture me laying on the couch feeling very sleepy, nursing a substantial headache, and all the while thinking about the many things I needed to do. Stressful! ) Somehow, I talked myself into not quitting..LoL!
I do hope you will grab your cup and join us for a little chat over tea. What are you drinking today? Please feel free to link up here if you would like to share a tea post or photos of your own. :o)
Today, I am sipping my Wedding Tea from Harney and Sons. Amy of Tea Girl in a Coffee World mentioned their newest tea a couple of weeks ago and I couldn't wait to try it.
It is delicious..no doubt about that! Just take a look at the ingredients and you will see why: Chinese Mutan White Tea buds, rose petals, cornflowers, marigolds, and coconut and almond oils. The taste is just heavenly! Rich..and almost nutty but with a lot of subtle flavors.
It's a perfect tea to savor in the early morning during quiet times. I'd like to chat with you about a life-changing concept I've learned from a new book that a friend loaned to me two weeks ago. It's called Boundaries by Dr.Cloud and Townsend. How I wish I had found it years ago!
For those of us for whom childhood and home life were difficult, this book is incredibly helpful. Sometimes it's just very hard for one parent or another to recognize the 'person-hood' of their children. It's usually because the same thing happened to them. That was certainly the case for me and my siblings.
What do I mean by boundaries? As an example, imagine that your neighbor has a problem respecting people's boundaries. So when he needs a lawn mower, he comes over and takes it right out of your garage...without asking. He is ignoring your 'boundary' which in this case is your property line.
An example of people who don't respect boundaries would be... A co-worker who often asks you to bail them out when they have too much work to do. Friends or family who ask for loans and get upset when you don't give them... People who expect you to do jobs or favors without recompensing you in any way and do so habitually. Adult children who won't get a job or leave home....inappropriate touching of a child by an adult..... In-laws who pressure adult children to do what they want or else. Guilt trips and manipulation of any kind--all of these examples are covered in the book.
Boundaries of many kinds were simply not allowed for my sisters and I. Naturally, I've always had a very difficult time saying 'No'. The results for any one in this situation are obvious: over-commitment, enabling others to be selfish, bitterness (at times) , discouragement, low self esteem, and even procrastination.
Have you ever had trouble with this? If you do, you certainly have my heartfelt sympathy!
It's not that those who overstep others boundaries are 'evil' or intentionally hurtful. They simply don't understand what is appropriate and what isn't.
It's up to us to set boundaries
so others know what is OK with us and what isn't.
I have had the unpleasant task of seeing my parenting through 'new eyes' this last two weeks. How easy it is to overstep the bounds of propriety with children moving from the childhood to adulthood! How hard it is to trust God sometimes with our children--to step back and let them fail--to have faith in them and God when we are looking at their 'human-ness".
I truly wish I could turn the clock back, and do it all over again. I know my kids could hear from God just fine, and I knew it then, but it was hard to back out of the 'mommy-mode' as they got older and trust them to our Heavenly Father's care.At least I do get a second chance with the three who are still home. I have been doing much better at letting go with them. :o)
The authors remind us.....that we can't control others
but we can control ourselves.
We can remove ourselves from situations, refuse to listen to inappropriate communication, and we can say NO.
I've found myself on both sides of the fence as I've read this book. I can hardly describe how eye-opening this was. That was a very humbling thing to discover for sure. It's sure surprising to realize what was at the root of many a tense moment with Dear Hubby. Too many times, over the years, I've found myself expressing my fears or hurt feelings 'through the back door' so to speak with pouting, anger, or a cold shoulder.
But thanks to this book, and some research, I've learned how to simply communicate those concerns in a kind way without any expectations of change. Gone are the 'hints of accusation' that I'm occasionally characterized my comments. I'm so grateful that the Lord answered my prayers about some of the struggles going on in relationships in our home. It's as easy now to communicate kindly, as it was to be unkind.
The new found freedom to say NO when I should is another great discovery and has allowed me to say YES to the right things and get my priorities in order.
Are we a perfect family? Not even close! But we love each other, and the Lord..so we want to work through our problems and do so regularly. This book helped me understand how best to encourage genuine respect and communication amongst all of us.
The first week, I felt like a child learning how to talk and walk all over again. It was all so foreign to me. I was surprised how much I let even business people take advantage of me. Lack of boundaries or lack of respect for them affects all of your relationships to one degree or another.
The second week, I felt so happy and hopeful as we have all began to understand each other better. Part of me felt selfish saying No, but I'm certain that was not true now. As the bible says, we each have to bear our own burdens (daily loads), which is different from 'bearing one anothers' burdens (unusually heavy load).
Clarke's Commentary on the Bible Submitting
- one to another - Let no man be so tenacious of his own will or his
opinion in matters indifferent, as to disturb the peace of the Church;
in all such matters give way to each other, and let love rule.
The one thing that we are all learning, at our house, is that, though the Lord wants us to obey those in authority over us and to defer to those under us, everyone deserves respect and a certain 'personal space' and relationship with God as individuals. Ultimately, we all answer to God first, then to each other. Leadership does not equal the right to total control nor does submission mean a call to total surrender. It's all about genuine and mutual love and respect for each other.
I Corinthians 13 4-7 Love is patient and is kind; love doesn't envy. Love doesn't brag, is not proud, doesn't behave itself inappropriately, doesn't seek its own way, is not easily provoked, takes no account of evil; doesn't rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth;
bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Our children are as much 'sisters and brothers' in Christ as we are. The older they get..the more we need to allow them to relate to and respond to God for their decisions and to be responsible for their own mistakes. 'Letting Go should be a very natural transition that we as parents need to cooperate with.
By the time our kids have left home to begin their adult lives, they should no longer feel the need to 'answer' to us for anything. For those who are married, that's what 'leaving and cleaving' is all about. The bible clearly describes the breaking of the parental bonds here. A new relationship is formed which allows for the liberty of the newly married children to be their own 'heads of the home'. We, as parents, move into a new season of life...I like to think of it as a chance to give more time to 'spiritual parenting' of the body of Christ..and growing closer over the years as a couple.
When we, as adults or children, feel that someone is truly going 'beyond' what is appropriate..we need to be able to say so and expect that NO to be respected.
It's not the defiant NO of a two year old. Our 'Nos' need to be gracious. It's easier to teach this to our kids through modeling than anything else.
Well, I've gone on long enough about this topic, I'm sure! :o) If you see yourself in either position..certainly know that neither I nor God is criticizing you for that. (I'm as guilty of this as the next gal.) The point is that we can LEARN how to treat each other in a way that leaves no one feeling like either a 'door mat' or a 'tyrant'.
Now that our family is learning how to 'set boundaries graciously', we are more able to communicate our genuine feelings..even negative ones, in a kinder and more constructive way rather than feeling 'stuck' in a hopeless situation. We are learning to understand how each of us looks at life and to care more for others perspectives and opinions.
If you are feeling like your boundaries are being overrun..or you find people reacting a lot to your 'leadership' or way of 'getting things done'...perhaps this book can help give you a new perspective and some tools for rebuilding proper relationships in your life and the lives of those you love, as much as it is in your power of course.
We can't and shouldn't try to 'fix' people, but we can remove ourselves
from their behavior in a loving, respectful way.
This gives God a chance
to work in their lives..instead of making others feel criticized or
rejected by us.
Today, I invite you to join me in a little self-examination here as we share tea together. If we want our families to be healthy and happy, both emotionally and spiritually, we will need to be able to set appropriate boundaries and respect those of others.
Have you ever had trouble with this issue? Is it difficult for you to say NO? Or is it hard to accept other people's "NOs"? Let's chat. :o)
Linking with these lovely ladies' Tea Parties..and Sites..
Last night was spent having a family night with the children, and this morning, I’m getting ready to go to a home school coop meeting, so I won’t be home today. But I didn’t want to leave you without a ‘Tuesday Tea’. So I’m using some former tea pictures and sharing an excerpt from a devotional I wrote on my music blog, Songs of Home.
If you would like to link up...here's the tool. I'll be joining everyone this afternoon when I get home. :o)
I don’t think I got a chance to share these thoughts and hope they will be a blessing to you today. I’d like to talk about a real challenging topic for most women (including myself at times)…WORRY.
I don’t know if you ever get overly worried, but I’ve decided to quit worrying about things..and start doing something about them.
Even my post yesterday about the Six Things List applies. Many of the things on the list have been worrying me for a long time. How much better if I had started DOING something about them rather than worrying.
Yesterday, I went to see the people at my father’s bank. I’m the executor for his estate and have been putting off doing his taxes for some time now. Why? Because I was worried that I had made a huge mistake. I closed the account in Dec. and could no longer access it. I needed to be able to print out the year’s statements so I could do the taxes.
But Wells Fargo took over Dad’s ban k. There was now no bank, and as far as I knew, no records. I’ve worried and worried over this. It had become HUGE in my mind. I thought maybe I made such a big mistake that it couldn’t be remedied and we would be charged tons of taxes..or worse.
Thanks to my Six Things List..I decided to ‘face the lion’ of unconfronted errors in handling the estate and go ask them. Either I had blown it or I hadn’t. But sitting and putting off the day of reckoning would accomplish nothing and only make things worse.
While running errands, I took my Dad’s folder with all his papers and walked in and told the banker what had happened. It took about an hour of phone calls to the former bank..and she was able to retrieve the records. Now I have a stack of papers about the size of three thick magazines. All the statements for a year..are on my desk. The worry is over..the fear is gone..and now I can be responsible..and do what needs to be done.
Why ever did I wait so long? Why was I so worried? I don’t know. All that needless misery is gone..vanished in one afternoon!
My daughter likes to say this quote when I’m bemoaning my overweight ‘state’, “The remedy is in your hands, Mom.” So true. So very true. Every day, instead of worrying, I can just not eat what I shouldn’t. I can do what I should in every area of life.
Worry can make life quite miserable! Here is the excerpt about worry from my devotions last January…
This morning, I was having devotions in my car while waiting for a child to get off of work. While I sat there, I decided to read my devotional, “Keeping a Quiet Heart.” I read several chapters before I came across the one about the uselessness of worry.
Matthew 6:27 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Or one inch to his stature?
Elisabeth Elliott was saying that worrying about anything is not only unscriptural…but useless. We can’t DO anything about the past except to make restitution..
We can’t do anything about possible future problems either…like a child going astray, a child getting hurt or killed. In other words, I shouldn’t get all grieved and in knots over ‘future’ crisis that have not even occurred yet or past events that are already said and done. All I have any control over at all is today..now…
What I had forgotten, until the Lord reminded me of it , is that the past and the future are both HIS province..not mine. I can’t turn back the clock..nor can I stop the problems that may occur in the future. Things have gone wrong and will go wrong..bad will happen..just as good things will.
But the future is beyond my control. If I grieve over future possible bad events..all I’ve done is grieve twice…once now when the bad thing hasn’t happened and again when it does..if it does. What a waste!
Worrying keeps me from doing anything to repair the past or prevent future problems by freezing me in my tracks. It almost becomes a form of self-pity.
If I’m so busy mentally wallowing in my failures and my fear of future failures..what I’m really doing is making the whole situation worse by my own inaction. Worry and fear stop us cold in our tracks.
It is God’s job to worry about both the past and the future. All He asks of us is to leave those two areas in his hands and simply trust Him..that he is handling those things…
I’ve seen enough miracles in my own life and the life of my kids to know he is CAPABLE. Our family ‘hall of fame’ is lined with miraculous ways in which God has provided for us and it should be more than enough to convince me. Instead, like a child, I must simply pray, trust, and obey.
I can’t undo past wrongs..and I can’t guarantee I will do the right things tomorrow…but I can OBEY TODAY…right now.
Today.. I can stop eating when I’m full..and not eat that sweet or fatty food.
Today…I can exercise or go for a walk.
Today, I can choose NOT to react to my child’s ‘supposed’ bad attitude…and look beyond..and attempt to understand the underlying causes of the bad attitude rather than throw a guilt trip on them for being upset and saying so.
Today I can be loving and gracious to my kids…and respectful and affectionate to my husband. Today….I can spend time with the Lord.
Today, I can pray about the things outside of my control and ask the Lord to intervene.
Prayerless living is proof of foolish self-reliance and doomed to failure.
Yes, I need to acknowledge that I’ve failed…I’m overweight, I’ve hurt my children at times..and even my husband however unintentionally. I’ve spent too much money. I haven’t been diligent enough with various responsibilities. I’ve procrastinated too many times and my projects have piled up..and I’m behind. Yes, I know I’ve failed. But….
I can make restitution where I’m able.. Only TODAY can I do anything to repair past mistakes or make tomorrow better.
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Are you caught up in the past..or worrying about the future? Now is the time to change that.
If we will do what we know is right TODAY…then the future will take care of itself. If we sit and worry or wallow in self-pity…we only dig the pit a little deeper…entrench the bad habits further…and we don’t get to live in the joy and peace of God’s love, His meticulous care, and his grace covering all of our sins.
Worry is easy and natural and requires no effort on our part. Obedience is hard work..but it is not too hard….We can do this.
If we get so focused on our fear of future or growing problems, we will not be free to focus on the solutions to our present difficulties.
"This command I am giving you today is not too difficult for you to understand, and it is not beyond your reach. Deuteronomy 30:11
Prayer, Faith, and Obedience are the best solution to worry. Are you worried about something today? Has fear or worry blocked you from making progress in your life?
Linking with these lovely ladies' Tea Parties..and Sites.. Cindy's My Romantic Home
Looks like Christian needs to retire these shoes! LoL!
book really hit it on the head...though really, the bible does explain it pretty simply. Thank you, Kendricks, for spelling "L-O-V-E" out so beautifully and practically in your book!
How I wish I had found it years ago!
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