Tuesday Tea No. 32- How Fear and Worry Hold Us Back

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Tuesday Tea No. 32- How Fear and Worry Hold Us Back


Last night was spent having a family night with the children, and this morning, I’m getting ready to go to a home school coop meeting, so I won’t be home today. But I didn’t want to leave you without a ‘Tuesday Tea’.  So I’m using some former tea pictures and sharing an excerpt from a devotional I wrote on my music blog, Songs of Home.

If you would like to link up...here's the tool. I'll be joining everyone this afternoon when I get home. :o)

I don’t think I got a chance to share these thoughts and hope they will be a blessing to you today.  I’d like to talk about a real challenging topic for most women (including myself at times)…WORRY. 

I don’t know if you ever get overly worried, but I’ve decided to quit worrying about things..and start doing something about them. 


Even my post yesterday about the Six Things List applies. Many of the things on the list have been worrying me for a long time. How much better if I had started DOING something about them rather than worrying. 

Yesterday, I went to see the people at my father’s bank. I’m the executor for his estate and have been putting off doing his taxes for some time now. Why? Because I was worried that I had made a huge mistake. I closed the account in Dec. and could no longer access it.  I needed to be able to print out the year’s statements so I could do the taxes. 

But Wells Fargo took over Dad’s ban k. There was now no bank, and as far as I knew, no records. I’ve worried and worried over this. It had become HUGE in my mind.  I thought maybe I made such a big mistake that it couldn’t be remedied and we would be charged tons of taxes..or worse. 

Thanks to my Six Things List..I decided to ‘face the lion’ of unconfronted errors in handling the estate and go ask them. Either I had blown it or I hadn’t. But sitting and putting off the day of reckoning would accomplish nothing and only make things worse. 


While running errands, I took my Dad’s folder with all his papers and walked in and told the banker what had happened. It took about an hour of phone calls to the former bank..and she was able to retrieve the records. Now I have a stack of papers about the size of three thick magazines. All the statements for a year..are on my desk.  The worry is over..the fear is gone..and now I can be responsible..and do what needs to be done.  

Why ever did I wait so long? Why was I so worried? I don’t know. All that needless misery is gone..vanished in one afternoon! 

My daughter likes to say this quote when I’m bemoaning my overweight ‘state’, “The remedy is in your hands, Mom.”  So true. So very true. Every day, instead of worrying, I can just not eat what I shouldn’t. I can do what I should in every area of life. 


Worry can make life quite miserable! Here is the excerpt about worry from my devotions last January…

This morning,  I was having devotions in my car while waiting for a child to get off of work. While I sat there, I decided to read my devotional, “Keeping a Quiet Heart.”  I read several chapters before I came across the one about the uselessness of worry. 

 Matthew 6:27 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Or one inch to his stature?
Elisabeth Elliott was saying that worrying about anything is not only unscriptural…but useless.  We can’t DO anything about the past except to make restitution..  

We can’t do anything about possible future problems either…like a child going astray, a child getting hurt or killed. In other words, I shouldn’t get all grieved and in knots over ‘future’ crisis that have not even occurred yet or past events that are already said and done.  All I have any control over at all is today..now…


What I had forgotten,  until the Lord reminded me of it , is that the past and the future are both HIS province..not mine.  I can’t turn back the clock..nor can I stop the problems that may occur in the future. Things have gone wrong and will go wrong..bad will happen..just as good things will. 

But the future is beyond  my control. If I grieve over future possible bad events..all I’ve done is grieve twice…once now when the bad thing hasn’t happened and again when it does..if it does.  What a waste!

Worrying keeps me from doing anything to repair the past or prevent future problems by freezing me in my tracks. It almost becomes a form of self-pity.  

If I’m so busy mentally wallowing in my failures  and my fear of future failures..what I’m really doing is making the whole situation worse by my own inaction.  Worry and fear stop us cold in our tracks.


It is God’s job to worry about both the past and the future. All He asks of us is to leave those two areas in his hands and simply trust Him..that he is handling those things… 

I’ve seen enough miracles in my own life and the life of my kids to know he is CAPABLE. Our family ‘hall of fame’ is lined with miraculous ways in which God has provided for us and it  should be more than enough to convince me.  Instead, like a child, I must simply pray, trust, and obey.  

I can’t undo past wrongs..and I can’t guarantee I will do the right things tomorrow…but I can OBEY TODAY…right now.  
  • Today.. I can stop eating when I’m full..and not eat that sweet or fatty food. 
  • Today…I can exercise or go for a walk.
  • Today, I can choose NOT to react to my child’s ‘supposed’ bad attitude…and look beyond..and attempt to understand the underlying causes of the bad attitude rather than throw a guilt trip on them for being upset and saying so.
  • Today I can be loving and gracious to my kids…and respectful and affectionate to my husband.  Today….I can spend time with the Lord.
  • Today, I can pray about the things outside of my control and ask the Lord to intervene.

Prayerless living is proof of foolish self-reliance and doomed to failure.

Yes, I need to acknowledge that I’ve failed…I’m overweight, I’ve hurt my children at times..and even my husband however unintentionally. I’ve spent too much money. I haven’t been diligent enough with various responsibilities. I’ve procrastinated too many times and my projects have piled up..and I’m behind. Yes, I know I’ve failed. But….

  I can make restitution where I’m able.. Only TODAY can I do anything to repair past mistakes or  make tomorrow better.   
Are you caught up in the past..or worrying about the future? Now is the time to change that.

If we will do what we know is right TODAY…then the future will take care of itself. If we sit and worry or wallow in self-pity…we only dig the pit a little deeper…entrench the bad habits further…and we don’t get to live in the joy and peace of God’s love, His meticulous care, and his grace covering all of our sins. 


Worry is easy and natural and requires no effort on our part.  Obedience is hard work..but it is not too hard….We can do this.

If we get so focused on our fear of future or growing problems, we will not be free to focus on the solutions to our present difficulties. 
"This command I am giving you today is not too difficult for you to understand, and it is not beyond your reach. Deuteronomy 30:11
Prayer, Faith, and Obedience are the best solution to worry.  Are you worried about something today? Has fear or worry blocked you from making progress in your life?

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Linking with these lovely ladies' Tea Parties..and Sites..
Cindy's My Romantic Home
Note: The teas are from Shannon Mucha, a friend, and the cup and placemat were from my friend Peggy Woody. Tim gave me the yellow rose.  :o)


Linda said...

So true. The Lord is sovereign. To worry is not to trust Him.
Another way of putting it ...
"Worry is a rocking chair; you go back and forth and you get no where!"
You are a very wise lady.
Blessings, L

A Bee In My Bonnet - Leslie Anne said...

I've also learned that the thing I put off the most is the one that I should do the soonest. It just eats away at you otherwise. Only trouble is, I need to be reminded of it on a semi-regular basis because I forget how important that single idea is. Thanks for the reminder Donna!

Needled Mom said...

It is amazing how worry can take over one's life at times. I liked this post, Donna. Your tea chats are always so much fun.

Donna said...

I'm glad you like my post today. The kids are really needing me today so I'm not getting to sit down and visit as much as I planned. Maybe later! The schedule is in HIS hands as you all know. :o)


Kathy said...

A leap of faith took us to the full-time RV lifestyle, totally dependent on God's provision for our next assignment.
It's sweet reminders like this post that keep my mind in check and my faith focused on Him.
Thank you!
Blessings, Kathy

Sandi@ Rose Chintz Cottage said...

Great post, Donna! To worry is to not trust Him. And worrying will not solve anything, but perhaps give us a few unwanted wrinkles. Thanks for sharing.


the⋆silver⋆of⋆His⋆fining said...

Thank you, Donna, for this great post! I rather stumbled upon your blog today, and the subject of fear and worry could not be more appropriate. Thank you for the encouragement.
And midway through reading I glanced over and saw your soldier son is where mine has been for the past year. He will soon be headed home.
What a Mighty God we serve, and how much more glory He receives when I choose to trust Him! "For we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of Him, and not of us." 2Cor.4:7

Terri said...

Beautiful post about living in the now Donna! Today is all we have, this moment to make decisions, will we be honorable to ourselves and treat ourselves with respect and love? If we do, then that love and respect will flow out from us to those around us. A win/win situation! Yay!
Beautiful photos to go along with your chat too. I hope you have a really good day!
Hugs of LOVE,

Trudy said...

Donna, this was such a timely post. I was just meditating on scriptures regarding this subject this morning not knowing that you had done this post.

Kim said...

Thanks for your kind words at my blog. I just discovered yours recently and found it to be delightful. I've thoroughly enjoyed exploring around. I, too, love to sew.I started quilting a few years ago. It is my new hobby love!

“There's nothing half so pleasant as coming home again.” ~ Margaret Sangster

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